#nice concept but terrible execution

[randomnameless]

Some of the stuff that FEH has put out makes me wish Trial Maps were a thing again. It'd let fans use enemy characters without breaking the story.

Eh,

As a concept, I loved the Larva (Epi?) paralogue in Nopes - you are basically playing as Larva, going to help his genocidal "allies" to run away from the Empire and the CoS, to the point where you fight against Cethleann, Cichol and Seiros.

And Larva in this map, is nothing but obnoxious, calling everyone beasts, mocking the Empire for not knowing why they fight, sprouting platitude about "fighting for his fwends" (the same ones he just dissed seconds ago) while deshumanising the Nabateans all along, calling them beasts and such -

Given the backstory between Agarthans and those specific Nabateans - the survivors of a massacre he knows of, hell he calls the main perpetrator an "ally" - there's little to no doubts that Larva here is being a big ball of, uh, prejudice and bias - ergo we're playing as the enemy!

However, because the Fodlan games are, the Fodlan games where only people belonging to factions from the latest feh banner are challenged and contested, there is no payback, no result from this paralogue. No Barney wondering why the eff was a Larva like fighting against Saint Seiros and people familiar but with a different hair color, no reason/justification behind this random battle, where lo, Larva fights/defeats survivors of a massacre he, uh, "didn't agree with" but totes supports given his views, mocks people for not knowing why they fight for but never reveals the audience or even Barney what this dream was about (I was helping Goneril run away from Cichol with Cichol's sister's knee plate, the one he obtained after vivisecting her and eating her liver!).

So, in a nutshell, I think you can make a game where you play as "the enemy" and call it a vilain route or a "bad ending" route and remembers Fates?

Everyone can be a hero in their own eyes, sure!

But with the Fodlan games, especially Nopes, given how hard the AG gang beats themselves for "maybe we're bad for invading the Empire to stop the war after it starts to hunt its randoms for funsies but trufax Randy is very nice and kind he let a random soldier escape while he was busying destroying a village" - you have the feeling that the "everyone" from the earlier maxim is just, the SB and GW and with that paralogue, the Slither gangs.

FE16 gave more "heroic tunnel vision" to each of its factions through each route, even if SS was a bit more nuanced - but you know who doesn't get any "heroic tunnel vision" or pov in those games?

And only gets an infodump at the end of the most superfluous route ?

Ultimately I'm not too keen on the Trial Maps designs (you're talking about the maps where if you finish the game 5 times you get a free unit right?) because I think that if you have a character you should write a plot that can accomodate for that character's presence without breaking it - but again, Trial Maps were the only ways KT found to give us playable Nabateans (Rhea'n'Sothis) and lines, since the main game refuses to do anything with them, like letting them talk in the microphone.

Short story, long story : a good story can fit "enemy characters" and have them follow their own plans (maybe in a gaiden) to give more insight on them, what they think and/or why they are thinking this, but it should be integrated in the game and shouldn't demolish it because "everyone's story is equally valid", or, and worse, shouldn't bank on the game not giving a voice to the last faction that is piled on by every other without even being able to reply.

[megkuna]

the whole amnesty program thing in this ep is boring af but also i hate it. sorry but who the hell came up with the idea of putting a bunch of fascists together for their recovery program. so many things are about to go wrong

[dreamsy990]

SPONTANEOUS MINI REVIEW BECAUSE I REALIZED THAT I HAVENT FUCKING TALKED ABOUT FRAGMENTARY PASSAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ok so. i actually really liked this one!

so uh. if you witnessed that incredibly long thread i made yelling about kh3 you will know that i. am not a fan of the look of modern kh. i think its kind of uninteresting compared to the delightfully cartoony style and just generally i dont like more realistic looks to games that already had a unique visual identity.

so im here to say that i think it works for 0.2! im a good way through kh3 and i dont think it works well there and ill get to that when i eventually review that game but. in 0.2 i think the new style fits the more dark tone very nicely, and the enviornments are absolutely gorgeous. like i came out of ddd thinking absolutely nothing could top symphony of sorcery in terms of world design and was proven wrong. the realm of darkness is my new favorite kh "world". for my mutuals who havent played kh, look at this!!! its absolutely gorgeous

and the environments are actually my favorite thing about this game. besides being beautiful, theyre also delightfully trippy and unsettling. theres a section where you have to climb up a seemingly never ending staircase, and every time you reach what you think is the top you hear aquas worst thoughts. a lot of the areas are twisted, destroyed versions of worlds seen in bbs. its very dark (fitting, for the realm of darkness) and honestly its a treat to just walk around admiring the view. the visual storytelling is as good as kh ever gets.

i briefly mentioned aquas thoughts a minute ago so ill bring them up again, her commentary adds a lot to the desolate atmosphere, and this game really feels like a character study. it shows her desperation, her worst thoughts, her hope despite everything, and its just genuinely good. i havent been able to say that about khs character writing since like. days. its GOOD.

i am. not a fan of bbs' writing. i think its got a good underlying concept with absolutely terrible execution, and it makes me wonder at times if the things i like about it were intentional or not. but this game takes the best written character of bbs and gives her more depth than they ever could before. i can say with confidence that aqua is one of the best characters in the series, and a lot of it is because of this game.

the tone here is very gloomy, but thats not really a complaint because the game is so short. the depressing atmosphere isnt too much to bear because youre barely in it for more than 2 hours. and i think that run time is EXACTLY long enough. it goes for exactly as long as it needs to tell the story and still give a moment to breathe.

as for gameplay. im not the biggest fan of the updated system. i like to think im open to change with kh's combat. i think the command deck has potential and the card system in com was fun and i actually liked days' panel system. but something about the way this new version of the system feels to play is just. unsatisfying. hits dont feel like they have any weight to me, and spells feel inconsequential despite being more grandiose than ever. its just not as good as it was before, and like its a sort of half assed replacement of reaction commands. the way they incorporated style changes into it was okay, but again its not as satisfying as it was in bbs. but maybe it was just satisfying in bbs because the rest of the combat there sucked

tldr, the things i care about in a game (writing and visuals) were fucking spectacular, but the gameplay definitely had room to improve. also if i ever have to fight a darkside again ill throw up and cry! 8/10, though im tempted to raise it to a 9 for the environments alone

[adobe-outdesign]

have you done a Grarrl review yet?

The Grarrl is a t-rex, and...well, that's pretty much it. It has all of the standard t-rex features: sharp teeth, reptilian eyes, and small arms. They're fine, but it doesn't feel like there's a whole lot with the base color that really makes them stand out outside of just having a lot of teeth compared to other Neopets (Poogle and Jetsam not withstanding).

I feel like part of the issue is that the Grarrl's body is completely solid in color by default, with no patterns or markings to break it up. Given their prehistoric status, I feel like stripes or speckles would've made sense; just something to break up the body and give them a tad more flavor. As is, all we have are the teeth and the green eyes with red pupils (which tend to be consistent across most, but not all, colors).

Beyond that, the base colors are alright, though for some reason the blue barely has any shading and the yellow is this off-putting dirty "mustard" color.

While the Grarrl's design has always been plain, I do think customization did them extremely dirty. Instead of being allowed to keep a more vicious expression, the Grarrl was instead saddled with an awkward smile that makes them look like they're posing for school picture day. In contrast, the old Grarrl's art gives them a big open mouth and allows them an angrier expression, which both looks much more natural and gives them a lot more personality.

Favorite Colors:

Maraquan: One of the only Grarrl pets that wasn't saddled with an awkward smile post-conversion, the Maraquan Grarrl is one of the best-looking Grarrls out there. Making a t-rex into a shark for the aquatic color works perfectly as a concept, and the execution's really nice; adding a very neat-looking ridged back fin and horizontal tail that sharks don't usually have, and fixing the plainness of the default Grarrl design by adding in a mottled white underbelly with small teal accents.

Neither version is terrible, though the UC/styled design is the better one—the fins aren't being forced into a fist, the colors aren't as over-saturated, and the tail fin shape looks a lot better (it's supposed to have a hook-like shape, not have a random spike coming off of it).

Halloween: Not only is a vampire a good choice for something with sharp teeth, but I really like the colors here; a very light minty body is contrasted with black and red accents, which makes it look both pale but also provides nice contrast without being too monotone. The cape also adds just the right amount of detail without being overly busy or detailed. The expression and mouth on the converted version, while still not as good as the old art, does look a bit more endearing and less awkward than usual, and I really wish they had used that mouth shape for the default Grarrl.

As of writing, there's only a "spooky" style instead of an actual nostaligic style that matches the old art, but reguardless it does look very nice. I like the pose and expression a lot, it brings back the black clasp (which was made blue for some reason during conversion), and I like the addition of the claws on the feet. Only complaint is that I wish they had given it darker eye bags, which were present both on the original art and the converted art.

Faerie: The faerie Grarrl having feathers is interesting, because feathered wings are usually restricted to avian Neopets; but then again dinosaurs are birds, so this is actually pretty clever. The orange, pink, and yellow palette looks nice, and I really like the speckled markings here and the addition of horns and dragon-like whiskers.

Unsurprisingly the UC/styled art is better, though I will say the converted has slightly better wings; I can't quite figure out the perspective on the original art. That said, the original art's head shade and expression look 10x better so you know, pick your poison.

[idiopathicsmile]

10 mini reviews of Venom 3: The Last Dance (2024), a movie I did not enjoy

10. I went in with rock-bottom expectations, and brother were they ever dashed.

9. You know how sometimes you walk out of a very mediocre film and think, "Boy that sure was technically a movie"? I don't know if what I watched last night was technically a movie

8. I saw Venom (2018) in theaters with my best friend because something terrible had happened politically that weekend and we wanted the cinematic equivalent of getting very drunk and then housing some Taco Bell (it performed this office admirably), but I never saw Venom 2: Let There Be Carnage (2021). I can state with some confidence this could not possibly have had much effect on the overall legibility of Venom 3: The Last Dance (2024)

7. Do you understand how charmless a movie has to be to make me roll my eyes during both a sing-along and an extended dance sequence?

6. My best friend, upon seeing the credit at the end of the movie that explained that Tom Hardy himself helped write the story, in a tone of deep disappointment and nigh-betrayal: "Oh no, is Tom Hardy dumb???"

5. Had the boom mic been hanging into every shot, it would not have been a sloppier viewing experience

4. Upon learning that it currently has an average user rating of 3.5 stars: gosh it sure was nice of the director of Venom's mom to review the movie so many times

3. Many of the lines felt like placeholders but my friend is convinced the script was not "written" by ChatGPT or the like because those programs are pattern-driven enough to make a certain degree of sense.

2. You'll have to forgive me; I am just a little salty because Venom 3: The Last Dance (2024) had a budget of $120 million dollars and used it to make a buddy comedy where the two parties seem to genuinely dislike each other and a special effects extravaganza that was genuinely ugly, and meanwhile I've written a narrative concept album that is a solid 40 minutes of music with character development and a full plot arc that I could confidently execute for $5000 USD, and I have to come to terms with the fact that I will probably never be able to raise the money for my silly little project. I could make that album 24,000 times with Venom 3 money and it wouldn't even go out of its way to be racist against Mexican people.

1. I honestly think even the monsterfuckers are not going to get anything out of this one, boss

[trekmupf]

a.k.a. Psychic puperty in space

Pros:

Yeoman Rand having some focus (altho see cons), trying to be nice and inclusive towards charlie, seeking help when she realizes the danger. She's doing her best here (this whole ordeal from her perspective is just very very real for a lot of people...) also her hair!

Kirk's cunty green top; Also Kirk's amazing gym outfit

Spock and McCoy arguing; Generally the trios dynamic

The rec room scene is again everyday life on board

Uhura singing and making fun of Spock

Charlie on the one hand being a human with barely any human interaction to learn from before this and having huge social difficulties and insecurities

ties in with him being a realistic teenager with teenager problems (wants to be liked, starts being interested in romance, doesn't know how to deal with strong emotions, is annoying)

It's got the right idea about "you need to respect women" on the whole (even though the execution is very... 60's)

The concept of someone whos been alone for most of their life with superpowers who's kinda fucked up

also him being an early version of the „sauvant- antisocial- asshole“ character trope we see lots these days

the episode clearly shows that Charlies behaviour is wrong (creepy, dangerous, obnoxious, even horrific)

Charlies situation as a metaphor for growing up in general: either you learn control and how to behave in society or you can't live in said society (although this is a speedrun from first try to exile)

(to be fair none of the adults explained things well and directly to him, and I'm so glad they don't have to raise a teenager together, it'd be a nightmare)

This picture! Looks like an 80's coming of age - sports - film!

Cons:

Early days inconsistencies (Clothes, rank,character writing flawed)

charlie -- while being genuinely creepy -- is also an annoying wet blanket at times

Robert Walker (charlie) doesn't really have a lot of chemistry with the other actors and can't carry scenes on his own, which makes the wet blanket a bit wetter

the pacing is off, mostly because charlie isn't interesting / charismatic enough to fill this amount of screentime, which makes parts drag

Yeoman Rand doesn't deserve this shit (despite the fact that she behaves corretly she gets treated terribly not only by charlie but the other men, no one takes her seriously, she just suffers and gets no justice)

special callout again of command not taking Rands worries seriously and intervening on time and treating her like shit

Great Moment: Rec Room, Uhura singing and the crew making a lil fun of each other

Counter: Kirk being topless for the first time! Summary: Lenghty episode about teenager struggles with high stakes that further sets up some of the dynamics of the crew Previous Episode - Next Episode - All TOS Reviews

[andromeda3116]

okay but some of the ideas in jupiter ascending are literally so galaxy-brained? like, the concept that capitalism taken to its utmost extreme would result in a "superior" (read: ultra-wealthy) class exploiting whole planets of people for their own gain? the way that the three siblings play off each other, when you're ultimately left like "shit man at least balem fucking told her he wanted her dead even though he had some seriously fucked-up emotions regarding his dead mother like holy shit can you say oedipus complex my god". but the sister is like, "the ultimate resource, the only one that matters, is more time" and that's a profound concept and also again so horrifically accurate and dystopian because she's literally stealing time from not just people but whole planets' worth of people, and has been for thousands of years, they've grown them for this purpose and of course that would be elon musk's fucking wet dream, to be able to buy himself more time, and while i don't think he or anyone else would just like. immediately jump to "kill whole planets for it" i also think that if he felt like that was the only way, he would be like "it's the Greater Good. i have Unlocked Immortality For The Human Race" and be totally blind to the fact that it was only for the rich ones, on the backs of everyone else. and yet she's still nice? just because you're a genocidal self-serving ultra-capitalist immortal monster doesn't mean you have to be a jerk about it. which is so. how the human condition works?

and yet this movie also has "bees can sense royalty" and whatever the fuck was going on with channing tatum's character and a wooden (yet somehow refreshingly horny*) love story and an exhaustingly-long chase scene that could have been thirty seconds and the Great Disappearing Sean Bean Daughter and

like it's somehow simultaneously "terrible idea, flawless execution" and "flawless idea, terrible execution"

(*in contrast to the "everyone is beautiful, no one is horny" trope, channing tatum looks like a snack and by god is mila kunis ready to eat him)

[sephirthoughts]

Hi! I hope you had a good day today.

For the ask game, what are your thoughts on 5 and 9 for Sephiroth?

I did, thank you! I hope you had a good day, too!

ON TO THE BURNING QUESTIONS

5. Sephiroth is such a wonderful layer-cake of pathologies, it's so fun to dissect the impacts on his personality. He is autistic-spectrum, hyper-intelligent, alienated, deeply insecure, and feels he has no 'place in the world'. Despite his insistence, under Jenova's influence, that he's the chosen one and meant to rule the world, he has rock-bottom self-esteem and almost no sense of self. He knows he's different but he has no idea who he is. Add being raised in a lab, horribly abused, and treated like a weapon rather than a person his whole life, and there's not a lot of Sephiroth left.

This would affect his living space in that it'd be generic, impersonal, highly functional, basically empty, serving its purpose as a place to rest, and nothing else. Has place to lie down, has place to shower, has place to dress=meets criteria. I doubt he'd notice if there were even blankets on the bed. It's a Sephiroth storage container, more than a living space. Which is terribly sad and now I am sad. BOOOO ME

Whether he's messy or not is another question. He honestly strikes me as someone who hates disorder if he ever thinks about it. The problem is, he does not think about it. He has executive function issues (see: his bout of manic hyperfocus in the archives, where he had books just strewn everywhere and didn't eat or sleep or bathe for days), and is generally unaware of anything pertaining to his own self-care, including messiness/dirtiness, unless they become a nuisance that disrupts his current fixation.

When he was being raised in the lab, he was a child, so there were people who cleaned, cooked, washed his clothing, etc., and in SOLDIER they definitely had people to take care of those kind of domestic things, so they could focus on training. Hence, he never learned to clean up after himself.

All of this wouldn't matter much, in a living situation with custodial services, but if left to his own devices, his combined lack of awareness, neglect of his own needs, and inexperience with such things would create a perfect storm. He'd forget to take the garbage out, never pick up after himself, not do the dishes, have takeout boxes everywhere, and have no idea that dusting, mopping, vacuuming, etc. even exist as concepts. I think his living space would be kind of awful. But he wouldn't notice.

That is, until Angeal comes over, has seven simultaneous brain aneurysms, leaves and returns with Zack and cleaning supplies, and they spend the next ten hours deep-cleaning the place, while Sephiroth insists it's not that bad.

9. This accords so nicely with number 5! Because he'd be a terrible roommate.

-He'd be quiet, courteous, and never have parties or eat your food, but he'd leave stupid long silver hairs all over everything (the less said about the bathroom shower drain the better), never clean up after himself, and act confused when asked to do so.

-He is definitely the type to always be forgetting his house key. Like, he may as well not have one.

-He leaves that stupid, ultra-sharp, nine-foot-long sword just LYING AROUND WHEREVER. Someone is going to lose a foot.

-He thinks he's a great cook and likes to share his talent with people, and he's too sweetly sincere and excited about it, so you can't bear to break his heart, and you wind up gritting your teeth and smiling through a plate of sticky, pasty, mushy pasta, with sauce made from frankly baffling ingredients (you put walnuts in the marinara? ohhhh...how…interesting. is this an anchovy?).

-He casually says absolutely horrible, emotionally devastating things, without realizing they're horrible. Example:

person: my mom was so forgetful, she always used to burn the garlic bread and she'd mix up my brother's lunch box and mine half the time

sephiroth: haha yeah, i know what you mean. on several occasions, Hojo forgot to send someone to change my IV, when he left me strapped to an exam table in the basement lab for multiple days, and i nearly died of dehydration and malnutrition

person:

sephiroth: parents, right?

-Lastly, Sephiroth absolutely never wears a shirt and in fact doesn't even own one. This is not an annoying habit, this is the habit that makes all the other ones worth putting up with.

[danikamariewrites]

Rockstar!Lucien Headcanons

A/n: thank you to @cursebrkr for coming up with this beautiful concept for Lucien. Please go check out their art it’s amazing! These r totally random and all over the place

Warnings: some nsfw concepts so minors dni (18+ please)

Rockstar Lucien is hot and he knows it. He's tall, muscular, and 100% covered in tattoos

He used to be self conscious about his face scar but then he adopted the “chicks dig scars” mentality and never looked back

that long red hair is just beautiful, he blow drys and styles it for sure!!!! He uses the best shampoo/conditioner so it’s always smooth and silky

He plays the guitar and loves whipping his hair around during his solos

His favorite is an electric guitar but will occasionally play acoustic if you ask him

Definitely has nose a piercing (changes from a stud or hoop depending on his mood) and definitely a tongue piercing too. There's also one that only you and him know about 😉

You guys met at a party after one of his bigger shows. You’re the friend of a daughter of some executive for his record label and you immediately caught his eye. He knew he had to talk to you

When Lucien loves, he loves hard and is very loyal and he just wants the same in return

He’s very cautious about getting close to people because he’s been hurt before and used for his fame. He didn’t want that to happen with you but after talking to you for a few days he knew you weren’t like that

Once he has you, he’s absolutely infatuated with you

On your first date he tries so hard to impress you but it goes terribly. He makes a complete dork of himself and his ‘cool rockstar’ facade slips. You thought it was so cute and endearing, he was surprised he got another date with you

You become Lucien’s muse when writing songs

You go to all the shows you can and even go on tour with him. If it’s a world tour he takes you to all the romantic spots in different countries and always takes you on fun adventures when he’s not busy rehearsing

You never get bored watching him on stage

Lucien makes sure you’re always sitting close to the stage so he can see you while performing. Whenever he sees you he always winks at you and starts dancing very suggestively on stage knowing it turns you on

Lucien is very protective of you

One time he stopped a show when he saw some guy harassing you. He was furious, he almost jumped off the stage but security escorted the guy from the venue before anything else happened

You watched the rest of the show from backstage that night. As soon as he was done Lucien took you straight home. He held you and apologized all night even though you told him over and over that it wasn't his fault

His fans absolutely adore you! If they recognize you at shows they always say hi and some even ask for a picture

You love watching him on stage and going out to parties together but your favorite times with him are when you guys can just relax at home alone

You love lazy days in bed together eating nothing but junk food and watching cartoons

Lucien is a child at heart and will insist you watch 2000s Disney shows (Suite Life of Zack and Cody is his fav)

Lucien has two nice cars and one really beautiful, expensive black motorcycle

When he bought it you weren’t crazy about it at first but when he handed you your own helmet and took you for a ride it changed your mind

You loved when he’d go super fast, it gave you an adrenaline rush

He's not a huge social media person, he only posts if he likes a picture of him from a show or event, or if new music is coming out

He doesn't like the media attention that comes with his job but he sucks it up

Lucien feels bad that you get wrapped up in it since you're a private person as well

He always has ways to bypass the paparazzi when you guys go out, he hates the way they shove cameras in your faces and the stupid questions they ask

He has punched a pap before for almost pushing you into traffic in the city

Some NSFW stuff (18+ from here on!)

Lucien plays guitar so he’s a god with his fingers. He knows exactly what he’s doing down there and can make you cum in seconds

His tongue piercing is also a plus when he goes down on you

It’s one of the metal balls and when he licks your clit the pressure is perfect

His favorite position is when your on top

Lucien loves when you ride him because he can see all of you and after your orgasm hits he pulls you into his chest

His other preferred position is taking you from behind

He loves running his hand down your arched back to squeeze the back of your neck

And he loves how deep he can get from that angle

When he’s in charge sex is usually rough and passionate. Love making is set aside for special occasions though, like if you haven’t seen each other in a long time

He’s always down to try anything unless it’s a no for you, he’d never want to make you uncomfortable

One of his band mates did walk in on you guys once in his dressing room and he never lived it down

[kyogre-blue]

Yanqing was my first and I love him to pieces but the lack of Welt Yang is starting to grate at me. One away from having full express crew... good luck and godspeed with your Hot Men pursuit, some of them are insufferable.

As someone who hateeees Liyue I expected to hate Xianzhou, but to my surprise I actually love the setup. It helps that their history is very relevant and actually comes up in the main quest, like - ages ago, they did a Masterful Fuckup, and their whole society now revolves around dealing with the fallout. It was nice, after Liyue's vageposting history and beliefs in market economy, where their gods are hilariously irrelevant to their daily life, to be able to say "ah, *this* is what these people believe and fight for". Helps that the aeons are npcs and as such Allowed to be fucked up, so both sides in the abundance vs the hunt fight have their points. And I find the subversion on wuxia tropes neat.

I share the "I wish I could skip this" sentiment though, the main quest was absolutely horrible.

I also find who Dan Feng was as a person and Dan Heng's feelings abt him as his reincarnation super interesting but like. So far the vidyadhara have by far the weakest story out of the xianzhou races (jiaoqiu HARD CARRIED the foxians there) and I know better than to expect anything. Finest Duel Under The Pristine Blue was a pleasant surprise, but Luminary Wardance was tedious as all hell and rife with missed opportunities (as much as I loved Yanqing throwing hands lol)

Out of all the minor quests you've triggered, have you done any of them? I think you'll like Arlan and Asta's companion quest :)

I haven't done any companion quests because I expect them to be longer, and tbh I am not planning to pay any attention. I do not care about the... vast majority of the characters, and I particularly feel like it's going to be a whole lot of minutia about their daily lives and/or irrelevant backstory. Which I don't really care to engage with.

On a basic level, I think that once you relegate things to "companion quest," that means this content is not important or interesting enough to be main story. It's a little bonus for people who care about these characters because they like them from the main story or like their designs. Since I don't care about the space station at all, I don't plan to read anything from these quests. Just like Genshin, I will set it to auto and do something else.

This sounds very mean, but Mihoyo destroyed any basic goodwill from me long, long ago.

In regard to Liyue and Luofu, I personally have a lot of... let's say reservation about anything that focuses on immortal or long lived characters. Once you make a character stick around for hundreds of years AND you love your lore, it's not a good combination. It gets convoluted fast, and you have to spend a lot of time very carefully maneuvering around why this character didn't deal with all the problems of modern day back in the past already. The easy answer is they couldn't, but if you want these characters to also be so totally cool for sure, it doesn't work out well. (Like wardance. Jing Yuan totally knew about Belobog's issues in the past but like, he was just too busy to do anything, but have a picture of him totally getting along with Igor.)

Additionally, I do not believe Mihoyo writers are capable of writing any kind of actual complexity in morals or viewpoints between characters.

And for every character that has a grain of interesting concept, they are surrounded by at least a dozen terribly executed ideas, so like... that's just not worth it.

[some-stars]

i have my askbox closed rn bc of the scam spam so @petralemaitre sent me this meme directly:

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers! Spread the self-love 💞

i have 62 to choose from but honestly i already know what my favorite 2 things i've ever written are so this will be fairly quick.

A quite unlosable game (dark angel, alec/max, alec/various): this is it! this is the favorite! it's my most beloved show of all time and i had Things to Say and it took me ten years (off and on) but i did say them! very well! i started it in 2008 so my memories are vague but i wrote it pretty much in order--the first idea i had was the almost-pubescent X5s being lectured on how their hormones were going to be manipulated. it was a science fiction story for me, before anything else, because it's a science fiction show that didn't get a chance to explore SO much of the juiciest most interesting concepts it put forth. and it was also me thinking about how the show at first fumbled, then did SO right by the eye-rollable "max goes into heat" concept. like when it comes up in the second episode it's treated completely as a joke, but when it happens again at the end of the first season--when we've bought in to the basic premise and established trust--it's treated as the terrible, sad violation that it is. so i thought, well, how could i pursue that thread further? and. so. yeah. love this story forever, best thing i ever wrote, does exactly what i wanted it to do and does it almost perfectly.

The absolute absurdity of end-series items (house of leaves): my other favorite thing i've ever written! i don't think this is quite as perfectly executed, but it's pretty close, and certainly no one else has done it better so that makes it successful by default. house of leaves is one of my favorite books of all time and i have SO many thoughts about it and all the things that it DOES. some of which the culture at large has acknowledged and much of which i've never seen anyone else talk about, the latter specifically being how rich and welcoming it is to feminist interpretations. which i could never manage to write the essay about that i wanted to, but it's all just in this fic instead.

children's work (the witcher, geraskefer): gonna cheat and put the whole series. it's kind of hard for me to love this one because i can see ALL the seams, especially in the second and third stories where i was trying so many new things as a writer and flailing around so much. but taken as a whole it's the longest single work i've ever created, and the response to it utterly blew me away. people loved this series, so so so much, it's been four years and i kind of still can't process it. this is the story that i think about when i feel like i've never had any kind of effect on the world and nothing i've ever done mattered to anyone. because this series made a lot of people very happy, and that's nice. (also i LOVE when i can come into a fandom and write something that nobody's done before. it boosts my ego like crazy. not that the concept of the fic itself is original--i lifted a LOT of the emotional beats from an extremely good SPN fic i read way back in the day--but no one had done a serious take on it in witcher fandom yet.)

felt it in my fists (teen wolf, allison/lydia): i was Deep into this show for like half of one summer, but i hated (and continue to hate) sterek so there was not a lot on offer for me. but there was femslash! idk, i just really like this story and it's special to me for reasons i can't really identify.

put on the red light (deadpool & wolverine): i don't necessarily like this MORE than my other fics in the fandom but i do feel like it's different and therefore special. it's very rare for me to write explicit high-key emotional conflict and fighting, bc it tends to give me bad anxiety, but MAN i loved writing the big screaming fight in this one. they both fully believe they're breaking up because the other one betrayed them in the most painful way imaginable, and it's awful, and i love it.

im not gonna send the meme to anyone else but if you are reading this please consider yourself tagged!

[slightlyrebelliouswriter23]

What are your thoughts on Suren?

thoughts on Suren.... thoughts. on Suren.... okay.

not everyone is going to like this and probably even less will agree, so keep in mind that this is just my opinion because you asked for it and i'm willing to give it. please take whatever measures you need to protect yourself and not start discourse about my opinion on my post.

i actually didn't like Suren for a good majority of the book. and not in a "i don't like you as a person" sort of way.

it was more that i didn't quite believe that i was meant to believe she was real. she seemed disorganised in a slapdash sort of way. captivating from far away, and yet nearly unremarkable once you got up close. what i mean by this is that the concept for her character was gorgeously unique, but the execution of her character didn't seem all that unique from Holly's other wild feral forest fae girls with an angry streak.

every book is an essay. it's the author's job to convince the audience. and i was not convinced of Suren's character—her skills, her magic, her fear, her anger.

some of her skills seemed too conveniently and hurriedly shoved into the narrative.

like her sudden uncanny ability to solve riddles with complex language when we had not been told prior to this that she had any previous interest in riddles. she had been living a mostly solitary life for years before this. when Oak and Tiernan first speak to her, they literally can't understand her because she hasn't spoken in so long and everything comes out garbled and scratchy and unintelligible.

how am i to believe she goes from that to solving complicated riddles to break people out of prison in a matter of days?

or her knowledge of the exact right passageway in the Court of Teeth. two years isn't a long time and she was a prisoner in the Citadel for most of it. prisoners don't run about the halls finding hidden corridors and trap doors. and if she did, why was it so casually mentioned right before the hidden passage was introduced?

why not make all of these things a bigger part of her backstory, her personality?

i.e. She liked figuring her way out of things just to see if she could. And also because it pissed off Lady Nore and Lord Jarel. She liked solving mazes and puzzles. She'd often make up riddles in her head when she was feeling lonely or bored or scared. A distraction in a life that wanted to swallow her whole. Her lifeline to sanity.

Best of all, Suren liked ruining things. She wasn't sure what it was, but something inside her revelled in chaos, in pulling at the threads. In watching a great and terrible unravelling.

If her unsister, Bex, built a tower of blocks she would find the best and swiftest way to knock it down. It had always been this way. It's why she sucked at Jenga. She just never got the point. Why would anyone want to build such a teetering thing on such uneven foundation? Suren would always find the brick most likely to topple the tower, just to delight in its fall. To feel the sweet relief of watching something fraught and all-consuming turn to nothing, right before her eyes.

When she got to the Citadel, she was a scourge upon the palace. If they tied her up she would be out of her stays in mere hours. If they locked her in a room she would worm her way out, hiding in the spaces between walls, the small crawl space of a turret, or the castle's many hidden passageways.

Whatever that thing was, the thing inside her that craved to break things, to watch things fall, Suren knew it couldn't be good.

this would give Suren a quirk that fits with her character, is useful to the plot, and distinguishes her as different in tone and experience from Jude/Charlie/Hazel/Kaye. "breaking her way out of things" would also act as a satisfying mirror to Oak's "charming his way out of things". and "that thing inside her chest that liked to break things" would be a nice bit of foreshadowing.

or! why not lean the other way?

i.e. Suren had a secret. Which was that she hadn't discovered the palace secrets while being held captive at the Citadel. She hardly left her rooms apart from when Lord Jarel and Lady Nore paraded her around like an animal. She was terrified. And sometimes, when all the world feels overly terrifying, the great maw of it open wide and yawning over your head, you become frozen. Trapped in a brittle, trembling version of yourself. Waiting to be tipped over the edge. Waiting for everything you once were to shatter on the floor like glass.

So Suren became more animal than girl. That's what happens when you are told over and over again what you are. When you are treated again and again like that very thing. You become it. Suren gnashed her teeth and growled at those who came too close. And yet, when Lady Nore was sent away from Elfhame with her promise of obedience to Suren, and Suren was sent back with Lady Nore, as if Lady Nore hadn't spent the past two years manipulating and abusing her child, Suren shattered anyway.

Picking up the broken shards of herself, she ran. Into the woods where she hoped no one would find her. Where she hoped, if they did find her, she could turn those shattered pieces outward, become something sharp to draw blood with. Where she hoped to hear the birds sing, and maybe find the occasional patch of sunlight.

She knew nothing of the Citadel. It had never been her home. She was not useful in the ways that Oak or Tiernan desired she would be. She only let them believe she was. But she'd be damned if she let the opportunity to bring her bitch of a mother down slip through her fingers.

this could be an "inverse of Jude" moment. a "let them overestimate me and despair in what i become" moment. a "sorry mummy did i come back wrong?" moment.

i also would've liked to have seen more of Suren learning to use the tools at her disposal.

for instance, if she's good at riddles, tell us she has always been fascinated by them! show us why she is fascinated by them! is it because she likes them or is it because she learned it was a way in which she could survive her abusive parents? show us that solving riddles/puzzles/knots is a part of her every day life before you have her jail-breaking everyone in a pivotal moment of the plot.

if she likes breaking spells and curses, show us more of her learning to use her magic apart from the prologue. tell us that she has a fascination with knots, with undoing them. that magic, to her, feels like a bramble of knots, and she can't help but pull the strings until they are undone.

but the focus seemed to be largely on Suren's "monster girl" persona, which would be fine if she actually acted like a monster. instead, she does pretty much the Morally Sound thing for the majority of the plot, is pretty decent at socialising, and goes along with the others a little too easily for someone who has been betrayed by most of the significant figures in her life.

the only way we are to know that she is a "monster girl" is that she tells us this over and over. tells us that she is ashamed of her physical appearance, that she's Made of sticks and snow, that that's why she's a monster. all of which does naught to convince me that she might actually be one.

TLDR: for most of the book, Wren seemed like she was extremely lucky, all bark, and no bite (which is ironic considering those teeth).

until the VERY end, when Madoc (bless him) encouraged her to sink her teeth into something. and when she did, only then did she finally become delicious.

and then the book ended.

so i can't really say what i think about her. i went from being intrigued to being bored to being unconvinced to being intrigued again to being positively tickled for about one chapter. i can only say that my attachment to her does not run deep at this point.

–Em 🖤🗡

more theories and analysis

[concernedbrownbread]

tua s4 spoilers. I thought I'd focus on some stuff I actually liked this season...

The acting was great, no one can deny that. The parts that were choppy was because of the script and not the actors themselves.

Episode one wasn't that bad. The premise was set up nicely and I liked where the characters ended up six years later, more or less.

I liked Gene and Jean. I wish they were a little more unhinged, but their character introduction was good.

Ben's weird ass tentacles.

Luther trying so hard to keep the fam together.

The entire town turning on them was fun. And the van driving in with Baby Shark playing was very funny.

Abigail was interesting. She was kinda creepy, being all motherly to the Brellies. And Abigail speaking through Gene was hilarious.

The Keepers were also interesting. I was hooked from the very first therapy session. It could definitely be more expanded on, but they served their purpose in the narrative

Viktor getting to yell at Reginald was 10/10. If there was only one reason for this season to be made, it's this scene

The Subways as a concept was fascinating. When Five walked in their first I was in awe.

The Deli the Five's gathered in was freaking awesome too. I wish it got more focus.

Diego and Luther's scenes together were great as always.

Klaus casually levitating. Finally lol

Lila and Allison getting stoned in the car was such a small part but so funny.

The moment they realise they don't know how Ben died + them finding out it was Reginald was great. Them speaking in unison was creepy and I loved it.

Viktor doing everything he could for Ben.

Lila stepping out of the train just as the door closed. I knew she would but it was still emotional.

Controversial, but the ending itself where they all die could've been a really good ending, and was by itself not that bad. Within the context of s4 it wasn't good because ... of the wierd drama taking up space that should've been dedicated to the siblings saying goodbye (eg, Five having a scene where he holds onto Viktor, the sibling he first reached out to back in s1), but if it was executed better it would've been a pretty cool ending.

I think we're alone now

"I love you guys ... but you were all assholes"

Yeah and ... that's it.

I'm going back to hating this season now, it was pretty terrible. At the very least I'll have s1-3 my beloveds. I'm never touching this season again except for fanfics.

[adobe-outdesign]

Shelmet/karrablast lines review?

I'm going to preface this review by stating that I HATE trade-only evolutions. I'll spare you all from an extensive ramble, but the tl;dr is that they're obnoxious, counter-productive, and ultimately only serve to make it harder to get certain Pokemon.

HOWEVER, with that said, these two lines are the only time the idea of a trade-evo actually seems justified due to the way the two interact with each other. It's still not my favorite thing in the world (I feel like they could just evolve by being placed next to each other in one's party), but at least there's a rationale behind it instead of just abritrary decisions on the part of GameFreak.

Anyway, all that aside, I really like Shelmet here, and it's probably my favorite out of these four. The snail combined with a knight theme is super simple but reads really clearly, and the droopy eye and silly mouth give it a lot of personality. The colors are also nice, with the pinks and greens popping nicely against the neutral gray shell.

My only nitpick is related to the typing—this should've been bug/steel, for reasons we'll get into later.

Accelgor has a completely different, more ninja-esc theme, but this makes sense due to the loss of its shell, which was where all the knight theming came from in the first place.

This design is also good—the lines on the head accent the swirled shape nicely, which is also fairly accurate to how a shell-less snail looks. The pinks and greens once again draw attention to the head, and the brooding expression is great.

I'll admit though, something about the lower body throws me a bit. The body being bandaged to make up for the lack of a shell is great, but the actual shape of the body is so... flat and rigid compared to the nice curves of its head. Maybe if it curled a bit at the bottom too it would have a better flow. The bandages are also a bit too dark in color, loosing some of the contrast Shelmet's lighter gray had. Still, it's decent and gets the idea across well enough.

Gotta admit, I'm not a big fan of Karrablast. The idea of a beetle Pokemon makes perfect sense because it's based off of various kinds of beetles that eat snails and/or pupate in their shells, but Karrablast is just so amorphous and generic that you'd be hard pressed to even recognize it as a beetle, which really makes the theme fall apart a bit. Maybe it's just a me thing, as I'm not big on Pokemon with more "ambiguous" body shapes like this.

I also think it should've had more to do with Accelgor thematically. Escavalier "steals" Shelmet's knight theme, so I feel like Karrablast should've also had a ninja-ish theme to match Accelgor.

All that aside, it's okay. The expression is at least a lot of fun with its little fangs, and the colors contrast nicely compared to the Shelmet line's, but the light blue triangle on the head feels out of place and I'm not a big fan of the weird head-pincers. At the end of the day, it's not terrible, but it does feel like the weak link in this line.

Escavalier, however, is pretty fun. Expanding on Shelmet's knight theme, it now has a pair of lances and a large area on top of the helmet somewhat evocative of a feathered headpiece. The shape of this headpiece also helps match with the bottom half of the shell with its curved shape. Overall, a fun execution.

I do think it could've been a bit stronger conceptually though. For one, Shelmet mostly keeps the same palette as it evolves, so it feels like the red accents on Escavalier should've been blue to match its pre-evo; it would also simplify the palette, seeing as it already has Karrablast's blues and yellows on its body.

And secondly, the typing. It definitely feels like the steel-type comes out of nowhere when Shelmet is only bug-type. I think it would've been much better if Shelmet was bug/steel and Karrablast was bug/dark; then when they evolve, it flips, so Accelgor would've been bug/dark and Escavalier's bug/steel now fits with the concept. Minor thing obviously, but it's always bugged me (no pun intended). I still enjoy Escavalier overall regardless though.

As a whole, it's nice to see a line (or lines, in this case) that finally puts the trade evo idea to good use. I think the concept could've been stronger in a few spots, but it's still a fun theme and obvious enough to figure out through the visuals alone.

[deke-rivers-1957]

ECU Film Ranking Part 1

This will be a 3 part series where after 10 or so movies, I'll rank them in reverse order with 10 being the worst and 1 being the best. My ranks are based on how much I liked the movie, how much I liked Elvis' character, and how well made it was. Each entry will have an explanation so I hope my opinions make sense. If you have any disagreements feel free to share them. Enjoy!

Roustabout

The problem with this movie is simple: it completely misses the point of Charlie's character. When you think about what the movie wants us to believe, Charlie is supposed to be a grown man who's got a chip on his shoulder about being made an orphan and wants his respect. While the movie does show him as pushing back when he's being disrespected, Charlie isn't a jerk who needs to get rid of the chip on his shoulder. If anything Charlie is a saint for having to deal with people who actively hate him. In fact outside of bit characters and Mr. Carver, everyone else is infinitively times worse. How are we supposed to think Charlie needs to learn his lesson when the whole time we're on his side of most confrontations? Overall, it was a good story concept with terrible execution as it a completely wasted potential storylines and an amazing soundtrack.

(John Lennon wrote Revolution 9.)

Wild in the Country

On paper this should be an absolute banger of an Elvis movie: An angry young man who has no faith in himself until he meets someone who inspires him to be better. Too bad the movie felt like it had no idea on how to work with that concept. You get the feeling that each writer had a different story idea but was never able to execute it from start to finish. For instance, the ending was supposed to be tragic but instead became bittersweet in the most mild way possible. Given how this movie initially sets this serious tone where a character's bad actions will have consequences, the ending does a complete 180. Nothing of consequence happens and the movie suffers because of it. If the most intense part of the movie is done and over with in 5 minutes with no time to even digest what happened before we see Glenn go off to college you just sit there thinking "what was the point of that if nothing came out of it?" It's slightly better because at least the first third gave us some of Elvis' best character moments with Glenn giving an emotional monologue about his life.

Love Me Tender

Story wise it's a step up from the other two, but still suffers from executing a vision. The entire 3rd act destroyed whatever character arc Clint had going for him. I get the idea that Clint suddenly turning on Vance and Cathy just because practical strangers filled his head with ideas was something that was added at the last minute to make Elvis more relevant despite an originally smaller role. I can understand Clint being insecure about his manhood and doubting his wife's loyalty, but the execution of that was terrible. Just fix Clint's character arc in the 3rd act, and this movie would've been fine.

Paradise, Hawaiian Style

There's nothing wrong with Rick as a character. The problem's that he's boring. He doesn't have much of a character arc as it's not like him saving Danny showed a new side of him. His womanizing is his character flaw and the driving factor of his irresponsibility. Him rescuing Danny doesn't change that and it definitely doesn't give his romance with Friday any weight as I simply don't believe they have any chemistry. Then again, the only vision this movie had was to showcase actual Hawaii and the Polynesian people. For the 1960s they did that in a pretty respectful way. Drums of the Islands is a great finale song with beautiful visuals. It's a nice finale to conclude an otherwise boring movie. But what a finale it is.

Clambake

As much as I love Scott's character arc, the songs are a mixed bag and the production at times is bad. I also wasn't that enthused about Scott and Dianne's relationship as I thought Dianne was boring. The side characters are fine but again nothing to write home about. I do think that if this was given more time it would've been better, but as it stands it's not at all the worst story. The ballads keep the soundtrack from being completely terrible. It's in general a very mediocre movie with an amazing character arc.

(Joe DiMaggio wore the number 5.)

Production wise this is easily the worst one as some of the effects are so bottom of the barrel of what they wanted to achieve. The story had elements that would've been amazing but simply never expanded on them. However, JODIE IS PEAK. Way more interesting than Josh and easily could've been the main character. The revelation that he's not Pappy's son alone should've been talked about in the movie as opposed to being a throwaway line. His ballad for Midge easily the best song in the movie. Such a shame this movie was rushed out. I genuinely think if they had Elvis just be Jodie, it would've been an absolute banger. The side characters have more personality than Josh and it carries what would've otherwise been a boring movie.

Jailhouse Rock

This movie is ICONIC but character wise Vince falls a bit flat and I have mixed opinion his relationship with Peggy. Vince waffling between liking Peggy and being cold to her is strange. Especially since Peggy simply disappears for a long period of time. When they get together at the end it's like all of the justification for why things were forgiven happened off screen as opposed to naturally seeing it play out. If you simply boil it down to a cocky young man falling off his pedestal and opening up to people, then the movie works. It's very well made but there are still wrinkles that keep it from being in my top 3.

(2 and 3 are interchangeable. They're about even so the difference is simply what I like a little bit more today.)

GI Blues

Story wise I don't see anything that's really wrong with this movie. I think Tulsa is a good character. Any criticisms I have boils down to how I would've written the same story but in a different way. I guess the one criticism I do have is that we get the lie reveal plot element over in done with so little time, that there was no point of even including it. Overall, it's still a well made and enjoyable movie but it doesn't blow me away.

Girl Happy

This is low key one of the best stories in an Elvis movie. It does the lie reveal cliche right as it gives this plot element enough time to develop, climax and then resolve itself naturally. Nothing about this is forced therefore everyone involved feels like they're real people. The point of the conflict is that Rusty is supposed to watch Valerie without her knowing that he's been asked to watch her. If Valerie knew, then she wouldn't want to be around him and would only become more sneaky. The emotional conflict of her finding him and Deena together isn't anyone's fault as it wasn't like anyone wanted to act out of malice. Everyone reacted within reason and despite the miscommunication, this is a situation where telling the truth would've only complicated things. You feel bad for everyone involved and regardless of who you think is in the right, you can totally understand where the other side is coming from. The songs are still very much a mixed bag and that's why I can't put it as my number one, but as a love story it's very underrated.

(You know I had to do this lol.)

Loving You

What can I say it's Elvis' story if he had an actual happy ending. As much as I don't like how Glenda is as a character the ending makes you think she will change. Deke is such a lovable character and it only makes you wonder why he doesn't have a lot of friends. I was angry for Deke when he just forgave Glenda that quickly by coming back. I'm not sure if it's simply because that's who Deke is, or if it's on the writers for not showing us his thought process. It's similar to my criticisms for GI Blues segment. It's simply a matter of "good concept, I just would've executed it a little differently". The songs are all functional to amazing. The movie is very well made as it doesn't feel the need to blast you in the face with color. If anything Deke going from generic "farmer's clothes" to a vibrant white/red combo is so fitting. When Deke is on stage he really comes to life. Even in his regular clothes, it's like they added a brightness to them. Unintentional I'm sure but it's incredible how Deke's clothes reflect his rise from nothing. He goes from being lonely and having low self esteem to feeling joy knowing he isn't alone anymore. Such a shame it's lost in the shuffle of his other 50s movies. This one definitely stands out on its own.

AN: Thank you all for following along with my reviews. If I missed a tag I'm real sorry.

Tagging: @arrolyn1114, @thedaisymaisy, @that-hotdog, @peaceloveelvis, @imaginationlast, @fuzzymusic94, @helen06dreamer, @sfull12345, @briefpandatimemachine, @alittlemoreelvis, @lynettethemadscientist, @motht-eeth, @ash-omalley, @spooky-hazex, @teamnefarious, @blighted-star, @ab4eva, @oh-my-front-door, @father-of-2cats, @atleastpleasetelephone, @xanatenshi, @crazymadpassionatelove, @burnthheparaphilia, @aliengoth3, @smokeymountainboy, @stormie-ryan23

@yksuwyksud, @tacozebra051, @alienelvisobsession, @vintageoldsoul, @ohmygiddd, @lovininapinkcadillac, @stephthestallion, @mistyspresley, @bisexualwvtson, @ahundredlifetime, @karel-in-wonderland, @elvispresleywife, @georgefairbrother, @moonchild-daniella, @musiclover712, @worldofyns, @sillybookmarks, @g00d2balive, @leighpc, @generoustreemystic, @peskybedtime, @thetaoofzoe, @renegadewarrior, @vintagepresley, @tupelomiss, @myradiaz, @pinkcaddyconfessions, @kiankiwi, @presley72elvis, @delulubutidontcare, @januarypresley1969, @livelaughelvis, @hooked-on-elvis, @slayingjd, @ilivebecauseiamforced, @dusintv, @cattcb, @eapep, @jaqueline19997, @richardslady121, @iloveelvis2, @lett-them-eatt-cake, @if-i-can-dream-of-elvis, and @lookingforrainbows.

[koboldfactory]

I tried the final trial again but in easy mode and had two runs get destroyed due to a lag spike right before the parry window against Wyvern and decided I am just not going to play that anymore. I’ll just watch a video of the new final boss or something it’s not worth it at this point. even when it’s doable or “trivial” it’s still tedious, finicky, and most importantly, not fun. makes me especially sad because I was actually genuinely hyped for the story expansion. Unlike my expectations for the base game, which were very lukewarm.

Also the cyberspace levels have nice concepts but terrible execution. The several mission objectives paired with pop-in and no checkpoints makes for a miserable experience and does not encourage replay-ability. I’m happy they’re actually fully 3D though with minimum automation.